Grief Is: Endurance

Grief Is: Endurance

Grief is : endurance. I probably had unrealistic expectations for myself. I probably thought if I dug deep enough and did enough therapy and self reflection, that I could shorten the duration or lessen the intensity of grief. . When I imagined what life might look and...
Grief Is: Dread

Grief Is: Dread

Grief is: anticipatory anxiety. A burning wick. A slow fade. A ticking clock. “How bad is this one going to hurt?” you ask yourself. Will it come in fits and starts? Will it suck me into its’ undertow until my lungs burn? Will it catch me off guard, a blow that...
Father’s Day 2020

Father’s Day 2020

Dear Micah, Happy Father’s Day! You’d be amazed at how the twins are growing. Eliana doesn’t even hesitate to throw herself off the high dive into a full layout. Levi runs for the pure joy of it, legs in full swing, a perfect mirror of your roadrunner stride. I think...
Revenge will not ease your pain

Revenge will not ease your pain

Manuel Zetina told his friend he’d kill a cop when he got the chance. I don’t know a lot about Manuel, the young man who murdered my husband. But what I do know allows me to infer some things. He was a minority. He was looking for the belonging and power that gang...
Missing Your Pandemic Buddy

Missing Your Pandemic Buddy

Grief is: missing your pandemic partner. Your trauma buddy. The person you process your decisions with. . . . Being in a global crisis has put all of us in uncharted territory. There’s no handbook for handling quarantine and all the physical and emotional fallout from...
Rachael Flick